I can't (one night) stand you

Had a one night stand the other day. We knew mutual people at the bar and ended up at a friends place. Drunken fun, wandering hands, spooning in the dark, one thing led to another, yadda yadda yadda.

Personally, I shy away from one night stands… To be clear, I’m voting for fucking on the first night, whether it’s on the ballot or I have to do a write-in, but if we vibe, why limit a good thing to one night?

The next morning, we were making small talk and that evolved to cycling through a variety of topics, from the existential angst that comes w/ AI, to the disarray that is the Supreme Court Justices situation, to theories about why the political climate was the way it is… all the stuff that Republicans think a progressive would talk about the morning after 😭😭😭.

Mid-convo, I realized we didn’t know each other well but had smoothly transitioned from the ‘drunk in the club’ phase to the ’this is how I view the world and what I pay attention to“ aspect of it all. The convo felt effortless but unfortunately that aspect was going to be short-lived. The conversation eventually veered into an area where we were on very different sides, and it was important enough (from my perspective) that I felt we were ultimately incompatibile…

If you’re black, you’re probably familiar with the anti-immigrant-adjacent rhetoric of ADOS-babble. She made divisive statements about black immigrants that would make Steve Bannon pump his fists with glee. Her initial statements came across as low-vibrational. and things went downhill from there. It wasn’t an automatic pivot towards unattraction, but a slow decline that picked up momentum every time she doubled down on a point that seemed indefensible or shrugged her shoulders at the similarities between her perspective and MAGA talking points.

I will say that when I hang out w/ somoene 1-on-1 and the do something that seems completely prejudiced/racist, I can be like a dog w/ a bone that doesn’t let up, so I kept circling back in a way that didn’t help the situation. I do think I could’ve showed a bit more restraint, but I guess we weren’t going to be hanging out again either way.

Ahhh well, can’t win em all and another dating experience to add to the books.

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